LGBTQIA (Will this soon encompass the entire alphabet? A perspective on sexuality & labels)…

**Controversial Opinion**

A little history on me. In my early teens, I experimented sexually with both boys and girls. As I got older, I found myself emotionally attached to a few guy friends and a bit of sexual attraction as well. I never truly acted on my feelings, although I did once use the name “Thew” for a phone dating service but chickened out when the one guy who answered said he’d meet me with his posse. It was a gut feeling of becoming a potential victim of a hate crime that deterred me. My Dad was never cool with anything I said or did straight or otherwise, but my Mom always said everyone had a little gay in them, hell she had an affair with a woman when I was 15. I am surprised my Dad stuck around for 17 more years.

I came out initially as bicurious and eventually as bisexual. Coming out in the ’90s meant a loss of a few old friends and the gains of quite a few gay and bisexual friends of both sexes. I flirted a lot, I danced in gay bars but I exclusively dated women. My brother was married to a woman for 7 years, got divorced had a civil ceremony with Earl (prior to legalization) and they have been together for almost 24 years with an adopted son.

In my 30’s I took an acting class and was paired off with my friend Mark, because I suggested we act as lovers he assumed I was gay (6 years later he’d come out to me). I remember telling a friend I was bisexual but she was adamant to believe it because in her mind it meant you had to have sex (although I know quite a few virgins on both sides of the spectrum who know in their heart who they are attracted to) and I didn’t. I was also told once by a lesbian that bisexuality is bullshit. That it’s a term for closeted homosexuals who refuse to truly be who they are. I can’t agree with that. I’m attracted to both sexes, period.

So in this crazy mixed-up world of the all-inclusive in the 21st Century, here is why you cannot lump everyone together. The only people that deserve equal rights are Gays & Lesbians. That long line of LGBTQI should primarily just be LG. Other people in the LG community agree with me.

Because bisexuals can live as straight people either some or all of the time, how would we remotely qualify?

T for Transexual, the trans community has become all the rage of late. I will never truly understand this situation. I can accept it but I don’t agree with it. On a warped morality scale I have an easier time accepting who someone can be in love with as opposed to someone who was born with the wrong soul. I honestly feel that gender dysphoria is a mental illness. Although I will say I don’t have an issue with Trans people using the bathroom they want to use even without gender reassessment surgery, because no one is any the wiser if you are using the toilet. Showering or changing on the other hand is another story.

Q is someone questioning (younger generations have also adopted the once derisive Queer as a positive label)

I or Intersex (which is inclusive to someone like me with an extra chromosome or a hermaphrodite with both sex organs)

And finally, A which stands for Ally ??? Come on really, adding this letter basically means straight people should be included…it doesn’t make any sense. Each of these letters is not intertwined, nor remotely the same, and shouldn’t be lumped together.

But this is just my opinion.

A straight and slightly bent opinion πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆπŸ˜‰

Published by M.

Artist from North Eastern Pennsylvania

74 thoughts on “LGBTQIA (Will this soon encompass the entire alphabet? A perspective on sexuality & labels)…

      1. Sorry just my daft English sense of humour…. Not always appreciated by our lovely cousins across the pond ..
        Your post made perfect sense to me……..honest πŸ’œπŸ₯‚ happy New Year incase I’m not up tomorrow night πŸ’œπŸ’œ

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I mean no offense and excuse me for not answering promptly it’s early morning and I’ve not slept most of the night.
        I have to admit I found the whole LGBT titles difficult to get my mind round. I always just except people as people , individuals so to speak why do we need labels.. we have enough and now there are more for me to cope with and worry I’ll get them wrong and upset someone. I hope that makes sense.πŸ’œ

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Now I completely understand thanks πŸ˜πŸ‘…I too really don’t believe in labels. It has really gotten out of control. There are so many subdivisions from the straightforward LGBTQIA. I swear every day there us a new type of person. But my point is that there shouldn’t be an umbrella term, it’s also not one big happy community there is prejudices within. There are also gay people that are church going Christian’s and those that aren’t, people that are promiscuous and those that aren’t, people that are Republicans and those that aren’t. Basically if anyone straight thinks we are all the same they are sadly mistaken. In my case, I married a woman who wrestles internally with her sexuality because she grew up in the church (her father is a Lutheran Pastor) but admitted to liking both sexes to me before we got married. So my wife and fall under monogamous married bisexuality who heavily lean straight.

        Liked by 2 people

      4. Yes we are a complicated species and I am old enough to know now there is no one fits all for anyone , there are a plethora of options for everyone! I say each to their own, own yourself and be happy. Sorry if I confused the issue I was very tired . Be safe and well πŸ’œπŸ’œ

        Liked by 2 people

      5. I’m with you I am confused with LGBT. Because I can never remember what they’re stand for. I’m also confused when people roll it off their tongue and then tell me what each one stands for. I am old school I guess, my memory doesn’t have room for certain things. I think we’ll ask be numbers one day. Remember the day they stopped asking your DOB because it was viewed as discrimination? Pretty soon when β€œwhat do you identify has?” will be dropped as well. I dunno. I never gave it any thought. I just let people be people. Now I feel I’m too aware of it and self conscious about being politically correct about EVERYTHING. That what I think. Just keep your side of the street clean and be kind to everyone.


      6. Too bad as I said discrimination even happens within. When I came out as bisexuality, a lesbian told there was no such meant that I was too afraid as a gay to come out completely. Talk about bullshit. Coming as bi lost me friendships all the same. No fear, am what I am…like who like period.


      7. I took it as..they were just closeminded. I can’t throw away the good times I spent with those people prior to my outing.


  1. I thought A was asexual… but I also gave up on keeping up a long time ago.

    Since I feel equally male and female (or neither, depending on your perspective), used to want a penis and still have penis envy, it’s not for me to say what’s going on in anyone’s mind or soul.

    I appreciated a teacher, way back in the 80s or 90s, saying that fetusesesess go through 3 intense floodings of hormones during development and there is/was a theory that they create sexual parts, sexual identify, and sexual/love preference. For all I know, he made it up. But I’ve always liked it for people who need reasons for things.

    My ex boyfriend is trans. She seems happier. Whatever works! The only part I had difficulty with, and realized was a recurrent issue for me, was that she came out and transitioned at 50-something and started acting like a teenager. Drove me up a wall when she’d write “giggles” … too young!! But I thought on it and realized, well… a large part of her was stuck at 15, the time when she shut down that side of herself. I still dislike a 57yr old writing “giggles” instead of “lol” (or just about anything else, but it makes far more sense to me.


    1. I read a few a few articles tgat said a was ally, again i prefaced this post with controversial opinion. Not expecting anyone to completely agree with me, just weighed on me to feel the need to express it. Yeah, writing giggles does sound a bit immature.


      1. She dressed like a teen too, as have some transsexuals I’ve known. But so have I so I’ve got no room to comment!!

        I was a proud, and popular, faghag in the 90s (I always liked the term, even though my gay friends hated it). Still would be but as everyone/everything became accepted, the men rejected me. Now I’m just boring.


      2. LOL… no, it’s my experience. I burned out on most things about 7 yrs ago. Turned out I was sick. I’m better now but doubt I’ll be that person again.


      3. Technically both but primarily physically. I was almost completely bedridden by TOTAL exhaustion… usually too weak to even brush my teeth. It took over 3yrs for me to finally test positive for lupus and simultaneously realize it was a reaction to my blood pressure medication (a not uncommon connection but no one, not even my docs, seem to have heard about it). It took months to get my energy back but in the meantime my knees got so bad that I’m disabled. And I deal with chronic depression and anxiety. I’m 58 but feel 95 a lot of the time.


      4. Sure go for it…let’s extend it to include the entire alphabet…why not also add BDSM πŸ™„ or let’s take it further down the path of sexual deviation and include the letter P


    1. Must be the meds I am on to control my anxiety πŸ˜‚ I can’t expect everyone to agree with me but I don’t really mind expressing an opinion or even exposing any skeletons in my closet. That’s just me being me. Take it or leave it.


  2. What a beautiful post. I really really enjoy reading it. Now you piqued my interest in reading some LGBT literature, which I have never explored before. Actually growing up under an extremely dysfunctional family situation, I am open for any kind of marriage situation. Actually marriage should be allowed for any people who love each other no matter what orientation and should not be allowed for those people who don’t love each other. Also people who don’t love children should not be allowed to have children through giving birth or adoption. It is very simple.

    Liked by 3 people

      1. Matt: Did you see the movie Longtime Companion? I hate that I didn’t keep the VHS because it hasn’t been released in digital. It was very much my life experience.


      2. The ending hit me so hard that I broke down earlier and earlier… first the scene, then the start of the music, then the scene fade before, full screen before, etc.

        I still have mt tshirt from back then: “All I Want Is The Cure And My Friends Back”


  3. Straight but slightly bent- wow πŸ˜‰
    The title is sooo accurate- it’ll soon include all the letters of the alphabet. LGBTQIAP+
    A stands for asexual though and I really believe asexuality needs to be represented more. I’m aromantic asexual and I’d really like to use some representation. People are soooo ignorant about us.

    Wishing you a fabulous New year!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I am a proud bisexual but I keep it semi closet for safety.

    I had long had a preference for women. And the homophobic culture in school made any feelings for the opposite sex be mentally forced into thinking I was crazy.

    I do remember looking at one of friends I did have and I really wanted to kiss him. Mentally, I was pushed by society to think I was just being crazy for thinking it.

    As an adult, I accepted my sexual nature. I bought toys for myself. And eventually I had sex with a few guys. Never a realtionship because I much prefer that with a woman. For such, I always made sure to have safe sex.

    While I’m married and monogamous now, it definitely makes me no less bisexual. And my wife supports me πŸ’–πŸ’œπŸ’™

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah when I was growing it definitely wasn’t accepted nor was it legal. I on the other hand have never had sex with men but I am attracted to both sexes as is my wife. Our marriage though is closed monogamous.


  5. Hmm. Personally, I think it’s all nonsense. People are so worried about labels and inclusivity that they forget it is actually people they’re talking about. It’s so important to give “gays” rights that they forget that it doesn’t matter if you’re attracted solely to aliens – you are a PERSON. PEOPLE have rights, not the label. There are two labels that matter: close minded and everyone else. Close minded people will always try to shut out those they don’t want to bother to understand – the rest of us don’t.

    Another thing that bothers me, that you touched on briefly is the struggles within that umbrella term. Why is it that people identify so strongly with their own labels that they actually have some ridiculous need to tell other people why their label isn’t accurate? Shush. No one asked you to pass judgment. Stand up, unite under the flag, and stop demanding non-judgement for those in your label while piling judgement on other labels. Just shush. Somehow we manage to unite by borders, race, gender, language, and religion, but the idea of uniting as PEOPLE seems to baffle us. Go figure.


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